Monday, September 18, 2006

(not very) cold feet

So having finally booked my tickets and made this trip (which I've been planning in various forms for years) into a reality, naturally my subconscious mind pops up a couple of sudden 'deep breath' type minor doubts, happily (so far) nothing serious and both dealt with pretty quickly but they also both made me laugh so I thought I'd share:

cold feet: I

This one hit me on my pre-birthday party, Liz and I were telling Keith about how we were all three taking a tour of the Black Isle Brewery next Sunday and somewhere at the back of my mind a little voice asked me "what kind of beer do you think there'll be in Australia?". Just for a second my blood ran cold: all I could think of were Castlemaine XXXX and Fosters, both of which to give them their dues... are swill.

So that gave me pause, I like beer and the thought of spending ten weeks with none worth drinking available was a saddening one. Quickly I consoled myself with the thought that (surely!?) an entire continent must have more than just two beers, heck... (I thought further) ...the only two french beers I knew of before I went to France were wifebeater Stella and 1664 neither of which is exactly a shining example of the french brewing industry's best, though they are at least perfectly drinkable...

Anyway sure enough, a few conversations with friendly online locals earlier today reveal that they generally hold XXXX and Fosters in just as low esteem as I do, and that there are indeed plenty of Australian beers I've never yet encountered. Hurrah! adventures in beer await! but more importantly I'm not going to the land of (only) substandard lagers.

phew!

cold feet: II

This one was much quicker and happened this evening. Since we moved Hamish has mentioned "giant" spiders on a couple of occasions, and being a bit of an arachnophile myself (and knowing what a big girl's blouse my beloved flatmate can be) I asumed he was exagerating... until just now when a gigantic (at least by UK standards) spider scurried under the sofa I'm sitting on, startling me somewhat. I reflected for a moment that I'm bound for the land of a million billion potential poisonous painful deaths. Then I shruged: Spiders (which I still love) startle me for a reason, namely my instinct to keep out of their way - if that applies to the harmless ones here in Scotland I'll be fine down under

6 comments:

Hamish MacDonald said...

Shaddup. I am not afraid of spiders. In fact, I caught the first big parade float of a thing and threw it outside.

I just don't want to have unexpected beasties walking over me, or to sit or turn over and crush one.

Also, despite your insistence to the contrary, I'm not sure they're harmless. The ones in our house have a pair of very big pincer/mandible/stingers, which are obviously used for something. I'm not allergic to bee or wasp stings, but I still wouldn't want to get either, nor have those insects in my house.

As for the beer, don't make us get all Alcoholics Anonymous on your ass before you go. Most people would worry about the friends they're going to meet before the beers they're going to meet.

Or perhaps you just know you're an affable weasel and friends are a given.

Patrick said...

I didn't say you were afraid of spiders, I said you were a big girl's blouse ;)

Seriously though we're on exactly the same page here: I don't want to get startled by or accidentally damage one of them either (and Spids are remarkably fragile - that whole hydraulic exoskeletal construction is fundamentally flawwed when you think about it) but I don't really think evicting them from the place on sight is worth bothering about - we live in a very old and pretty porous builidng after all.

As for their being harmless, if you don't believe me then maybe the Wildlife Trust can put your mind at ease - "There are 620 different British spiders. None of the spiders found in Britain are poisonous to humans and they can't hurt us.": those "big pincer/mandible/stingers" are called palps and they're just sense organs. The worst you'll get from one of our eight legged interlopers is the spider equivalent of a good sniffing.

AA-wise *grins* if it makes you feel any better your second guess is closest the mark there - I wouldn't go as far as saying friends were a given but mostly because as well as being an affable weasel, I'm an english one and therefore ingrainedly modest :D

Seriously though I appreciate your tollerance of my mild alcoholism and trust you'd say something if it ever got out of hand ;)

Hamish MacDonald said...

Eeew! Arachnophobia or no, I don't want anything touching me with its palps.

I take it this is the etymological basis for us saying something is "palpable" -- except by that standard nothing would be palpable to us humans, since we don't have those hanging from us.

(I'm really fighting the urge to make some remark about floury baps.)

Patrick said...

I think your "ew" is coming from confusing palps and paps (which I suspect is also where the urge to talk of floury baps comes in) but it's OK - palps are not spider boobies.

Cursory investigation of the etimology of palpable suggests its roots lie in an old word for the soft palm of the hand (palpus) so maybe being stroked by a spider is a more accurate description of what you're fearing than being sniffed by one was, either way it's neither harmful nor (imo) icky so you can relax.

Pat S said...

What in your experience is the French brewing industry's best?

Belated happy birthday. Hurrah for your trip of a lifetime.

Hope you find time to post those "interior shots" you mentioned before you go.

Patrick said...

hi Pat,

I'm working on the interior shots (lots of photo-merges to sort out) and will try to get them uploaded soon.

In my (limited and entirely subjective) experience I'd have to say that a little known brew from the Vendée called La Melusine is a strong contender for the title of the country's finest. Sadly though that's the best I can do for an internet link (other than to point you at the Wikipedia entry about the mythical figure the beer is named for) to find any of the beer to try you'd probably have to visit the region.